Ready? Or not?

I've tried to write this post a couple times. I'm not quite sure what I should put. I'm officially overdue and that is fine. I have food in the freezer, I have a clean house, the nursery is ready, the bags are packed. I'm ready in all sense of things that needed to get done, but I'm not ready at all.

I'm excited to meet our baby! I can't wait to fall in love with their beautiful face and officially call it by name.......

BUT I'm a nervous wreck in the same moment. I've had such an easy pregnancy. I've had no problems, no major scares, no swelling, not being too uncomfortable (I'm still relatively good most of the time.) How am I going to handle labor, I'm not even sure I'm going to know I'm going into labor. How am I going to treat Nick- I tend to get mean when I'm not comfortable. How am I going to deal with all the company and visitors (especially both families!)

Then when I get home, am I truly going to know what to do? I've been around babies and kids my entire life. I know them, but what about my own...will I be able to do it, knowing I can't pass baby on when it gets tough.

So all these thoughts are just tumbling around and I know it will all fall into place, it'll be a great time and I'm going to love it.....but

Baby, you can stay in as long as you want too! I want you to be ready and let's pray that I'm ready when you're ready!

I'm having the heebie jeebies. I put on my shoes this morning. They were sitting in our entryway. It's a process now to put on shoes so I was slightly perturbed when I felt something in my one shoe and it didn't feel right. I sat back down and went through taking it off and examining it. Nothing came out, so I got under the bright light and a HUGE cricket was in my shoe! GROSS! It got washed down the sink, so as to never visit my shoe again! I can still feel it crawling on my toes though. I hate that feeling!

I love fall! Fall is a time for new beginnings and a time for celebrating endings. There are many favorite things for me about fall! So...in no particular order.....here are my favorite things about fall for 2009 and why!

1. Fresh paint-The basement is painted. It needs carpet and then it is ready for a party! I can hardly wait to get my house put back together!

2. Husker Football-I went to my first game in over 5 years two weeks ago! I made it up the stairs and had a great time! I forgot how neat the atmosphere is down there! Can't wait to watch the rest of the season!

3. Apples and Carmel Dip-I do believe this is my end of pregnancy craving! I've had a lot of these and I don't plan on stopping eating them anytime soon! My mom and I took Tristan down to the Apple Jack Festival. Got some yummy apple donuts, apple butter and of course apples!

4. Harvest-I should hate it, My husband works 12 to 15 hour days, I don't see him and its crazy, but I love this time! I love seeing his excitement and thrill when his farmers have a good harvest. I also love watching the combines, especially at night.

As for school it's going well. The kids are getting into the routine and starting to follow rules and procedures better! I'm getting ready to wind down. I have 2 more full weeks and then a week of half days and then I'm done. My sub is lined up and I'm spending time getting plans really finalized and ready for her.

We've got 30 days left or more or less before Lil Dittmer arrives. I'm feeling pretty good. I've had a few contractions here and there, but nothing serious. I start weekly dr. appointments on Monday. I've got to interview 2 daycares this week and next week we meet our pediatrician. The nursery has all the furniture in, everything has been washed and I need to put a few more things away. I went shopping today for some lounging clothes and nightgowns. After I get that all washed, I'm ready to pack my bag for the hospital. I know that I'm somewhat of a procrastinator, but am feeling pretty good about where we are with everything. Hopefully that feeling lasts through the next two weeks as I'm very busy finishing school and baby gets closer! I've been really bad the last trimester about taking belly pics, but a few people have requeted, so I'll comply and put a 36 week picture up on Monday!

Hold on to your hats ladies and gents...it's been a whirlwind around these parts!

I can't believe it's August already! Summer has FLOWN by!

In a nutshell we've been doing house, grad school, selling corn, traveling, baby.

Our basement is in the painting stages! We've got about 2/3 painted. Very thankful to my grandma who primed the entire basement! Yeah she's 79 and AMAZING!

I completed my first summer of grad class! All A's!!! Go ME! Taking the fall off due to baby, but planning on taking a class in the spring.

Nick is doing the corn thing and being amazing at it! He won the regional award and the national award for top Resource Manager at his company! He has two pretty glass plaques to go up in his new office.

We went to KC for his yearly meeting and are heading to the Ozarks at the end of this week for a family reunion. Both short trips, but also good to get away! Because of his award he also gets the chance to go to Chicago in a copule weeks for the weekend. I'm not sure if I can go or not due to work, but if it works I'll be there! Chicago is my favorite big city!

As for baby, we're good. I'm 28 weeks tomorrow!!!!! YAY for 3rd trimester! I haven't started nesting yet. I hope it kicks in soon! I have a LOT to do. Still haven't found daycare and haven't done the pediatrician yet either. The nursery is painted, but that's about it.

Well I'm off to bed! Busy day tomorrow: Doctor, prenatal massage, painting and getting reday for vacay!

SwapTastic

Oh boy was Mamarazzi's swap fun this time around! I don't have pictures (camera cord is MIA and my house is completely destroyed-different post), but let me tell you Josie filled my box with all kinds of fun for the 4th of July and a BBQ. I had decorations and hats and plates and drink mixes! My favorite of that stuff are my ice cubes that look like stars! They will even work for Husker football to throw in a pitcher of tea or lemonade!

But Miss Josie out did herself with my most favorite item of all! She made me a personalized star red, white, blue baby quilt and she has outdone herself! It's gorgeous and I can't wait to display it! Here is a picture of it from her blog! Isn't it great!

Thanks again Mamarazzi and Josie! Can't wait to do another swap!

That Time of the Year!

I got goosebumps today in anticipation of something so fun and so exciting! I was in the magical store that is Target. It had been a while since a walk-through had been completed. I made my way through the clothes, shoes, stationary, entertainment and toys. I was to the back corner and I saw the signs hanging from the ceiling and I knew!

It was time!


Back to school supplies!!! In all their glory, while they were still mixed in with the grills and patio and outside summer things, they were there! Notebooks and binders and pens and pencils and backpacks and lunch bags! I can't wait to start shopping for my kindergarteners and myself this next year!

Here Comes July...

Where oh where did June go?

It's been a whirlwind! I can't believe July starts next week! I've had so much going on and I've got so much more going on in the next 6 weeks!

School ended on a pretty good note! It was hard to say goodbye to all my co-workers and next year will definitely be different, but it'll be a good different. Speaking of next year, I finally got a joyb. I'll still be teaching Kindergarten, but at a different school. It's a bigger school and we have brand new Kindergarten rooms which is exciting for me! I've always been in a portable, so it'll be nie to be in a real classroom and have room to do things.

I'm supposed to be starting my 4th week of summer, but in reality I haven't had any time off yet. I took 2 weeks of classes and then last week taught VBS all week! I'm not quite sure if I'll have a week off to do nothing, but I suppose it's better this way. It helps the summer go faster and keeps me on a schedule.

I'm sitting here typing and the baby is doing aerobics. That's pretty much all he/she does! We had our big ultrasound on Monday. We decided not to find out the sex, but the baby looks great according to the dr. No worries or problems at all! The bump just keeps getting bigger every day, but I'm feeling great! The heat gave me a few problems last week, but hopefully the humidity goes down and I can keep cool.

The basement addition is going well. We are to the point of hanging drywall. I suppose I should start picking out paint, but I'm not quite motivated to do that yet. We're planning on emptying the office in the next 2 weeks and so we can get the nursery ready, hopefully before I head back to school it's mostly done.

As for fun, we haven't really done anything lately. We're going to Larry the Cable Guy on the 4th of July and hopefully we'll get to go boating a couple times with friends. We're also going to KC w/ Nick's work and also to the Ozarks for a family reunion.

I guess that's life in a nutshell. Even though its not a nutshell. Well I better get to finishing some laundry and vacuuming and picking up. Have a good weekend!

Jobs Suck

I just want to cry. I am stressed about job stuff. I just needed to get that out there. This is the only place I can.

Mamarazzi's Swap

I've always wanted to do one of Mamarazzi's Swaps. She's so careful and thorough. I never get in on time though, so today I am.

This swap is all about Red, White and Blue. It doesn't have to be patriotic, but I've got some really cute ideas already! Can't wait to meet my partner!

Update

I can't think of clever titles or clever writing. I want to update though.

Work-
My mantra is 8 more days, 8 more days, 8 more days. I don't have a job yet. I've heard rumors about all kinds of things and it is disheartening, but I have a contract, so at least in these times of unstability I have a job. I just need to know where I'm going to be so I can focus on daycare.

Baby-
The babe is good. My stomach is getting harder and bigger every day. I feel pretty good physically. I'm 18 weeks on Monday. I had an appointment a week and a half ago. The heartrate was 147 and was moving a lot. I don't go back until June 22nd which will be my big ultrasound.

Life-
The banging has started in our basement. One wall up and some more to go. I jumped on the bandwagon, The Twilight wagon that is. I read the whole book in two days, watched the movie tonight. I can't wait to start the next book. I'm taking 3 graduate classes this summer. I don't think I'll really have a smmer. It's a sruggle, but something that will help me in the long run.
Wicked is next weekend, I'm pretty excited! My weekends have filled up fast again, but that is ok with me.

Belly Bump and More

I do believe my hormones have me getting irritated very easily. It's been quite the range of things. Another driver, the lack of maternity clothes, those kindergartners, being walked over by a few people, trying to be thoughtful and instead feel like I got slapped in the face and a million other things that I can't place right now.

I finally found my camera and am planning on taking belly pictures, but the ones that I took by myself didn't really turn out and Nick has been working 12 hours or more each day while planting is is going on.

I'm 16 weeks today and feeling great! I have gotten quite the belly! Some of my bigger pants that worked great 3 or 4 days ago are now tight. It's pretty much maternity full time now.

I haven't found a new job for next year yet. (I got surplussed at my school...and am looking for a new school. No news yet, but the positive is that I still have a job within the district!)

We haven't started on the basement yet. Probably next weekend. Have a lot to do before we can turn the office into a nursery. We have already had a shower. We got a lot of great stuff!

Oh, It's so beautiful out...why am I laying on the couch on the computer and watching TV?

I'm exhuasted and out of energy...and I got a new laptop to play with! LPS has a program and I had one of the oldest desktops in the district, so I got a new laptop! It's so freaking awesome!
Mac is so stinking cool!

I'm officially in my 2nd trimester and feeling pretty dang good...most days! Some days I have quite the baby bump and some days, I don't even look pregnant. It's hard wearing maternity one day and regular the next. I go through about 2-3 outfit changes every morning. One of the many joys of pregnancy I guess.

We're working on our landscape...slowly but surely. We've put in edging for 3 flower beds and have planted some bulbs. Waiting to make sure that there isn't gonna be a late April frost and we'll plant some color.

I know that all sounds pretty boring but between work and Nick planting...life has been pretty non-existent.

There are some things I'm looking forward to: Girls reunion next weekend and Kenny Chesney the week after that and a wedding and camping...that's 4 busy weekends in a row! YIKES!

Secret's Out...

I had to stay away from writing a new post for a while. I've had a secret and it's REALLY hard for me to keep secrets. Easier on the internet than in person, but still difficult. But its time to spill my guts...

I'M PREGNANT!

and we are thrilled! I'm not quite to 12 weeks, but almost there.

I've been pretty sick in the evenings. Sometimes I'm starving, but most of the time I want nothing to do with food...unless it's chicken nuggets from McDonald's or Ice cream.

I had an ultra sound at 8w1d and the little peanut is precious! I don't have a belly bump yet, but pants are getting harder and harder to button.

So while the word is out on blogger....it is still a secret on Facebook. I'm not quite ready for the entire world to know...So if we're friends on Facebook, please don't say anything....YET!

I suppose later this week, I'll update on the rest or my life....it's had its ups and downs the past month, but overall its been good, especially with this happy news!

Signs of Spring

It's a balmy 70 degrees. The sun is shining, the skies are blue, and the snow is GONE! I have on flipflops a t-shirt and jeans. THis is what I love about Nebraska! Let's hope that March is done with its lion phase and we'll have lamb days for the next 17 more days!

In other news....ummm....I'm like on theater/concert overload in the next few months! I am going to Children of Eden, maybe Nickelback, Steel Magnolias, Wicked, Kenny Chesney and I can't forget the circus.

I am house/kid sitting for a week in 2 weeks. I'm slightly regretting this decision, but I keep thinking about the serious cash flow that will give us. Especially as we're finishing our basement.

Speaking of basements....ugh! I hate planning this out and what's going where. I never knew it would be so much planning! On the plus side, this requires us to clean out.

I've only been with Nick for 3 years, married almost 2 and I'm dying at everything that we've accumulated! HoLy CoW! We spent over $60 on tubs last weekend. I bet I end up buying even more!

I'm so in the mood to spring clean the entire house! I hope we start this weekend! Hopefully I'll be motivated to do it still!

This is not the race I trained for. This is not the race I entered. But for better or worse, this is the race I am in.

Heard that quote in church this morning. Can apply to so many different people in so many different ways.

May the race that you are in whether it's one you've trained for and entered or one that has been given to you, be a race that you endure, a race that you celebrate and a race that shows how much you can do!

Long Time No Talk

Yes, I'm aware I've been gone a while. Yes, I'm aware that I haven't commented on any blogs in a while. Yes, I'm aware that I haven't had any exciting or over the top posts.

I'm here. I'm struggling to get through each day. I'm physically drained right now and there is no end in sight. I'm aware that I don't have it near as tough as most people, but this is tough for me right now.

I'm thrilled that February is almost over. I am also nervous that March is almost here. I have to get busy on some things. Somehow, it'll get done.

In the meantime, know that I'm still reading and still praying and thinking about you guys!

Rantin and Ravin

I really hate parents that hurt their kids. It makes me so sad. In my small class of 10 I have 2 kiddos dealing with abuse/neglect right now. I just want to strangle those parents. I could type on this forever, but I'm in school and if I start typing and thinking about it, I'll start crying.

Recap of The Bachelor

I love the Bachelor and I love reading other people's posts about it. I've been updating my blog every 10 minutes, waiting for certain people to make their hilarious comments.

I was suprised that he let Stephanie go, but not entirely shocked. She kissed him like his mother would kiss him and then there's the whole, man-look she's got going on. She'll find a guy after this show though, gurantted. I don't see her being the next Bachelorette though.

Naomi and Jillian worry me, a lot. It's like one big adventure for both of them. I don't see them totally being ready for the role that a step-mom would take.

Molly, she's cute, but man...I can't place the problem that I have with her. I just don't feel settled with her and Jason.

As for Melissa, I really think that her date at home solidified her spot. She didn't even balk about having to go over to Jason's instead of her dream and romantic date.

As for next week, I'm excited, dead doves, grandma's shipping her off to northern canada, parents uncomfortable with the publicity of it all, and probably a run-in with Deanna. Can't wait!

20 or Less

Yesterday was a busy day. I had groceries to get and it was 3:30. We were supposed to leave at 4:45 to go to a super bowl party. I decided Wal-Mart would be quicker than the local store, and since I needed several other things besides groceries,I wouldn't have to make multiple stops.

As I pull into the parking lot, I panicked. It was FULL! Busier than before Christmas, or so it looked. I drove straight to my secret spots. Full, so then I see a lady loading up her car. She's got the first spot and it's not handicapped! I race down the aisle, cut through and race back up. She's done! I put on my blinker and patiently wait. She slowly gets in the car and after about 2.4 minutes decides she can go. I pull into the spot! Score Wal-Mart-0 Becky-1. I can beat him at his own game!

I grab a cart and head to my first spot-health and beauty. I've got it all in like 2 seconds. I remembered the stuff that wasn't on the list. Score: Wal-Mart-0 Becky-2.

I head over to the make-up to get face wash. The shelves are empty. I scour them while trying not to push people out of my way. No luck. Score: Wal-Mart-1 Becky-2.

It's time, I put on my game face and head to the grocery section. Beer, first. I have envisions that they're out. But no, they're not. Check off 1. Head to yogurt, slim pickings but my needs are met. Start making my way down the aisles. It might get hairy here. People are literally in front of every item I need. Don't they know I'm on a time constraint. Score: Wal-Mart-2 Becky-2

I get to the only empty aisle. I see an elderly lady lose her footing, but catch her self. She needs soup off the top shelf. I grab it for her and head on. I feel like I forgot something in that aisle. I get to frozen. I did forget something. Do I leave the cart and take the purse or push my way through the whole aisle. It's packed now. People and carts on both sides. I brave it through with the cart. It takes FOREVER. Score: Wal-Mart-3 Becky-2

I get back to frozen. They've price reduced my frozen meals and there is like 4 in the freezer. I see none that I like. Score: Wal-Mart-4 Becky-2

It's quickly going down hill. I need produce and bakery. I can still finish strong. Except they don't have any choices. The grapes aren't great, blueberries are out, lettuce is wilty, oranges are expensive. It looks like I may have to go to the local store later this week. Score: Wal-Mart-5 Becky-2

Time for check-out. I scan the grocery side check-out, I see all the lines 2-3 deep. Well sometimes the other side is faster and that's the side I'm parked on. Head on over there. Oooh, it's busy. I count my items. I see 22. I can go in 20 or less. I get in line. It's about 4 deep but moving quickly. I get to the register. The guy behind me is talking loudly. I feign some excuse about some things being buried to the cashier. As I'm unlaoding the guy come up and starts counting my things. He shakes his head in disgust. I don't care. I'm on a time crunch. She scans, I load, and avoid eye contact.

I get out alive and look at my receipt. 31 items. Oh, well. 6 of them were the same thing.

Wal-Mart may have won the battle, but rest assured the war is not over. I will conquer eventually.

Time to check-out. Every lane is packed.

He's home! He's home! He's home!

I wanted to strangle Nick on Sunday and then we made up and he left on Monday. He was gone for his birthday, but I had big plans when he made it back home Wednesday night, well where he was they got 15+ inches of snow in less than 24 hours. So he couldn't leave Wednesday afternoon. I was so sad, but he made it bak and he's across the room from me where we are watching TV together. It's almost perfect.
The bed won't be empty tonight and I'll have to be quiet when I get up in the morning and start picking up after him again, but I love him and I'm so glad he is back where he belongs!

Lots of things have happened while he was gone and I was sans computer. Plus I got tagged to do 25 random things aout me....so let's see if I can come up with 25 things that have happened since I last updated.


1. I'm addicted to the Bachelor.
2. I'm addicted to The Biggest Loser
3. I'm loving that blueberries are a little cheap right now.
4. My dog turns 1 tomorrow.
5. I'm accepting some big things.
6. I am starting to get serious about my masters.
7. I am so glad that I have true friends at work.
8. I'm sad that those true freinds won't be around next year.
9. I' addicted to a Wii game.
10. I worked out 3 days this week.
11. I am excited that we are spending time with a new couple.
12. I am getting new sheets because of something that Sadie did.
13. I need to exfoliate.
14. I kept up with housework all week.
15. I'm caught up with the laundry.
16. I chipped my windshield.
17. I am anticipating a TV event in 7 days.
18. I am loving teaching right now.
19. In six school days I will have taught Kindergarten for 100 days.
20. I am going ice skating this weekend.
21. I only eat chili with cinammon rolls.
22. I get to play cards tomorrow.
23. I didn't wear jeans all week even though I can.
24. I've gotten a TON of compliments about my new hair cut.
25. I will decorate for Valentine's day this weekend.

People I'd like to strangle...

my mother

my brother and his girlfriend

my husband.

In that order. Excuse me while I go sob and cry and avoid.

Absent but Here

I know I've been absent. I know there are many things I could write about.

I could tell you about how school is. That I'm to the point of the year where I have to start job hunting. That it stresses me out. I could tell you that I'm excited for spring b/c we're going on a field trip. I could tell you that we're switching things up and that its not the "norm" and I'm excited for it. And scared of it at the same time.

I could tell you about how I am struggling with the whole having a baby and the doubting of my ability that I have and that feel like I'm subconsciously analyzing myself and then psyching myself out and therefore think that I'm not trying my hardest to have a baby.

I could tell you about what Nick and I have been doing. How Sadie is. How grown-up my nephew is becoming. I have so many things that I have wanted to share.

But none of it comes out like I want it to, none of it really feels that worthy of the blog, none of it makes sense on paper like it does in my head or my heart.

So I won't go into details on that. I'll just tell you that I'm here, I'm breathing and taking one day at a time. And for now that will have to suffice.

Meanwhile, I'm reading and occasionally commenting and you my dear bloggers have kept me smiling, kept me praying, kept me laughing, kept me crying, kept me grounded, kept me me at the time when I don't think I am even close to me.

I'm Dying...

Not literally, but it sure feels like it. My head is pounding, I can barely keep my eyes open and my voice is fading fast!

Welcome to the first day back from break after 18 days.

I'm exhausted and I still have 2 more hours to go.

Thank Goodness I was smart and planned my massage for tonight after school.

Hopefully Mr. Corn is planning on making dinner and doing laundry tonight, because when I get home I'm planning on laying on the couch and watching TV until I fall asleep.

HELP ME!

AHHHH! What'd I do? I tried to strike through 1 word and I struck through my entire blog....HELP ME!

My Top 10 To-Do List

This isn't a very exciting Top Ten. But it's a must and what better way than to make a blog post and Writer's Workshop!



Top Ten Things I MUST.....No, Should do before break is over.

1. Put away Christmas stuff

2. Take out winter/snowman stuff

3. Plan for next 2 weeks

4. Join A Gym

5. Clean my house

6. Do Laundry

7. Finish Organizing the Basement

8. Go Through the 2 foot pile of crap in Spare Bedroom

9. Eat a whole bunch before I start my "diet"

10. Sleep in 4 more days!

Will it all get done....NOPE! Guranteed that 9 and 10 will get done, everything else...eh, thats small stuff and you're not supposed to sweat the small stuff, right?!?

Head on over to Mama Kat's and see the other great Writer's Workshop Assignments!